Most people become Resident Advisors to help give first year students a great first year experience. Some do it for the free rent. Of course I did it to help people, but I truly think that no RA really knows exactly what they are getting into, and what the consequences on your social life and mental health can be. I thought that I may as well document what it has been like so far, as well as continue this throughout to really highlight what it’s like from someone actually in the role.
It’s incredibly rewarding:
This is probably the best thing about being an RA so far. You form amazing bonds with residents, and I can honestly say there is nothing better than when you see everyone getting along and everyone included. There are residents that you instantly highlight as ones to potentially worry about, the shy and quiet ones or those who don’t fit in with the norm, and it’s incredibly rewarding and heartwarming when you see those same residents right in the middle of a conversation or activity. Another thing that really makes you love your job is when residents come to you for help/advice. While it may be irritating to try remember some things, it’s awesome to know that they feel you are someone they can talk to and someone they can trust.
Sometimes, you’re going to be the bad guy:
At least where I am, the legal drinking age is 18. This brings the constant challenge of making sure that residents are drinking responsibly. This includes making them split boxes etc to stay under the 2L limit, tipping out any spirits and making sure there is no drinking after 10pm. Generally people are quite polite when you tell them off, but when they are slightly too drunk they can become aggressive or extremely defensive. The only way to really combat this is to make sure you form positive relationships with residents, meaning they respect you more.
You’ll have to make sacrifices:
Inevitably, being an RA means you’re rostered on at times you really don’t want to be. Personally, I gave up football to become an RA after playing it for 13 years and I miss it every single day. When you sign your contract, you are signing a legally binding document to say that you will only miss RA stuff for academics. This means that all of a sudden you may have to miss parties or family events if there is something going on at the hall that you have to attend. While you can see friends etc. whenever you aren’t on duty, even having to say no to friends once or twice due to duty has a knock-on effect meaning there are less invites in the future.
You’ll lose some friends:
Being honest, it can be lonely being an RA sometimes. Coming into the RA job after being a resident, it’s an incredibly different set-up. When I was a resident there were 32 other people on my floor who I could hang with and just mess around with. There were always people there to yarn to and have dmc’s with. As an RA, you still have the people on your floor but you’re not their best friend. You’re not there to become best mates with them, you’re there to do a job. While it’s great to have good bonds with your residents, you can’t become close with any of them and definitely can’t do anything that may compromise your position as an RA. This means that you then have to rely on those friends you have already made. This is where I have done badly so far, as I have really only relied on a couple of friends and I have definitely relied on them too much, which isn’t fair on them. I’ve started to talk to those people I stopped talking to over the summer, and hope to catch up with them soon. Many RAs become very close, I don’t know if it’s because we are all in the same boat but several RAs become very very good friends. For me, I just don’t feel I could be close with more than one or two of the RA team. In saying that, we are very tight and I know almost all of the RAs would have my back.
You’re always working:
Because you live where you work, even when not on duty you’re always an RA. You can’t really slack off. Sure you can relax, but you are always in the spotlight and always have to set an example. Some RAs forget this, and will call the duty RA to sort out issues that they should be sorting out themselves. If you don’t act, it looks like you don’t care.
Your team may get on your nerves:
This one is inevitable, no matter how hard you try. There will always be people in the team you don’t like as much as others, ones that get on your nerves. There will be times that an RA doesn’t show up to something they should be at, or times when an RA says or does something that you feel is unprofessional and it will really get on your nerves. This is difficult because you really just have to put up with it. There are RAs that will ham it up in the team meetings, and make it sound like they are the best RA in front of management and you just have to hope that they can see right through the act.
You’ll need good time management:
As RAs we have to each run 6 events throughout the year, I’m already on five. Each event requires hours of preparation. Different events require different prep, but they all take time. It could be a sports team that you have to run trials for and then organise on the day, or it could be running a week-long event for 330 people that requires constant updating all by yourself. We all have busy schedules with uni, it’s not fun and it’s not easy, and you really have to make sure you balance your time well. In saying that, it’s essential to take a step back and have some time for yourself or you will probably go crazy.
So far though, even with some of the difficulties, I have loved every minute of being an RA. So far it’s been challenging and even frustrating but it’s incredibly rewarding.